Blog l Park Ridge, IL l Athans and Associates

Ask a Therapist: Am I Making Progress in Therapy?

Tue, 18 Nov 2025 06:00:00 GMT

If you’ve ever sat in a therapy session wondering, “Is this even working?” — you’re not alone. It’s a common question, and it makes total sense. Therapy is an investment of your time, energy, emotions, and often money. Naturally, you want to know if it’s paying off.

The tricky part? Progress in therapy doesn’t always look the way we expect it to. Learn more about signs of progress in therapy, and how it may be different than what you think.

What Therapy Progress Doesn’t Always Look Like

Let’s start by clearing up some myths. Progress in therapy is not always:

Feeling better every single week.
Solving all your problems in a straight line.
Having constant “aha!” moments.
Agreeing with your therapist 100% of the time.
Never struggling with the same issue again.

In fact, sometimes you’ll leave a session feeling a little drained, emotional, or unsure — and that can still be a sign that something important is shifting.

Signs You Are Making Progress in Therapy

Progress is often subtle and builds over time. Here are some signs you’re moving in the right direction, even if it doesn’t feel dramatic:

You’re becoming more aware of your thoughts, behaviors, and patterns.
You catch yourself reacting differently in situations that used to trigger you.
You’re talking about things you used to avoid.
You’re more connected to your emotions — even the hard ones.
You’re taking small steps toward goals (even if they feel slow).
You’re being more honest with your therapist — and with yourself.

Also, let’s not forget: just showing up consistently, even when you don’t feel like it, is progress.

What If I Feel Stuck?

It’s totally normal to hit a plateau in therapy or to wonder if things are moving fast enough. If that’s how you’re feeling, bring it up in your session! Therapists want your feedback — it helps shape the work you’re doing together.

Try asking:

“How do you think I’m doing?”
“Are there signs you look for to measure progress?”
“I’m not sure if I’m improving — can we talk about that?”

Good therapy is collaborative. If something’s not working, your therapist should be open to adjusting the approach or exploring new strategies.

Progress Isn’t Always Comfortable

Here’s the thing: sometimes, things feel harder before they feel better. As you dig deeper, you might uncover emotions you’ve been avoiding or revisit painful memories. That discomfort doesn’t mean you’re going backward — it may actually mean you’re finally facing what needs attention.

Healing isn’t linear. Growth takes time. And therapy is a process, not a quick fix. If you’re questioning whether you’re making progress in therapy, that’s not a bad sign — it means you care. You’re engaged. And that alone is a powerful indicator that you’re on the right path. Keep showing up. Keep asking questions. And trust that even small shifts can lead to big change over time.

The mental health professionals at Athans and Associates are here to help you make progress in your personal goals. Reach out today if you’re interested in scheduling a session .

About the Author

Courtney Griffin is a Licensed Professional Counselor at Athans & Associates. She works with children and adults, and has a Master’s Degree in Clinical Mental Health Counseling from DePaul University.

How to Pull Yourself Out of a Midlife Crisis

Tue, 04 Nov 2025 06:00:00 GMT

Mid-life doesn’t show up politely. It barges in — uninvited and unrelenting. You wake up one day unsure whether you're running out of time or just spinning your wheels. That career you once sprinted toward feels stale. Relationships shift. Dreams go dim. And through it all, you’re still expected to function, perform, and smile. But here's the thing: a mid-life crisis isn’t always a collapse — it’s often an alarm. A call to reimagine, reset, and rediscover who you are when the dust settles. The good news? You’re not alone, and you’re definitely not done.

Reflect & Reset Through Mindfulness

Sometimes, inspiration doesn’t roar. It whispers. But you can’t hear it over the chaos unless you get quiet first. Mid-life is a noisy chapter — full of decisions, regrets, and replays. A short, daily mindfulness practice can offer a pause button . Not a cure-all, but a clearing. It teaches you to observe without spiraling, to breathe before reacting, and to listen to what your mind and body have been trying to say for years. This isn’t about perfection or enlightenment — it’s about giving yourself five minutes to not fix anything and just feel. You’d be surprised what shows up when you finally stop running from the moment.

Pursue a Job That Lights You Up

If your job drains you, it’s not just a paycheck problem — it’s a soul leak. And mid-life brings that leak into full view. This might be the season to step toward a different kind of work — one that fits the person you’ve become, not the one you used to be. Sometimes, that starts with your resume. Taking an hour to update it reminds you of your wins, your skills, your resilience. Saving it as a PDF gives you a clean, professional version you can send without losing formatting. Take a look at this if you need to convert, compress, rotate, or reorder pages with ease.

Reignite Curiosity via Creative Hobbies

You don’t need a side hustle. You need a side joy. Something pointless on purpose. The kind of thing that makes you lose track of time in the best way . Whether it’s painting, playing piano, tinkering in the garage, or writing badly on purpose — creativity stirs the parts of you that routine numbed out. It’s not about being good. It’s about being awake. Mid-life can feel like a long tunnel unless you strike matches just to see what flickers. Hobbies won’t replace your career or solve your crisis, but they just might lead you somewhere you didn’t know you needed to go.

Go Back to School

You’re not too old. You’re too smart to stay stuck. If work no longer excites you, learning something new can unlock what’s next. Going back to school in mid-life isn’t a retreat — it’s a power move. Especially now, with online programs that let you study while holding down a full-time job. Degrees like a bachelor in business and management open doors in leadership, operations, and project-based careers — built on skills you’ve likely already started developing. This isn’t starting over. It’s starting smarter.

Strengthen Mood with Movement

You don’t need a personal trainer or a gym membership — you need to move like you mean it. Mid-life stagnation isn’t just in your job or your routine; it’s in your joints, your breath, your energy. Movement isn’t about getting “in shape” — it’s about reconnecting with a body you’ve ignored or judged or overworked for too long. A walk around the block. A free YouTube dance class . Stretching in your living room. These small acts don’t just shift chemicals — they shift perspective. The body remembers joy, even when the mind forgets.

Reframe Midlife as Opportunity

The phrase “mid-life crisis” gets tossed around like a punchline. But maybe it’s not a breakdown. Maybe it’s a wake-up. What if this is the moment you stop living on autopilot and start asking better questions? Who do I want to be now — not who did I promise I’d become 20 years ago? Reframing doesn’t erase fear, but it adds fuel. It says: this is not a dead end. It’s a pivot point. And you get to choose what comes next. Mid-life, with all its discomfort, can be the most clarifying, intentional chapter you’ve lived yet.

Give Back by Volunteering

When you feel stuck in your own story, go get involved in someone else’s. Volunteering pulls you out of your head and into your heart. Whether it’s mentoring, delivering meals, or helping at a local shelter, the act of giving rewires something inside . You remember that you’re not powerless. That you can make an impact. That your experience — even your pain — has value beyond you. It’s a reminder that healing isn’t always internal. Sometimes, it shows up in the doing. In being needed. In being part of something bigger than your own uncertainty.

Find Clarity with Professional Counseling

When everything feels foggy, sometimes you need a guide. Not a cheerleader. Not a fixer. Just someone trained to help you make sense of the mess. Professional counseling can be that reset button — a structured space to explore the root of your unrest without shame or shortcuts. With the right therapist, working through emotional turning points becomes less about “getting back to normal” and more about building a new kind of normal — one that fits who you’ve become. Athans and Associates offers this kind of grounded, compassionate support for anyone seeking deeper self-understanding and emotional renewal.

A mid-life crisis isn’t something you conquer. It’s something you walk through — sometimes with a limp, sometimes with a grin, often with both. But along the way, you gather things: wisdom, perspective, courage you didn’t know you had. You try new tools. You let go of old masks. You make changes, not because you have all the answers, but because the questions won’t leave you alone. That’s the beauty of this stage. It demands your attention. And if you answer with honesty, movement, and a little faith? You might find that what you thought was falling apart… was actually just making space.

Discover compassionate and expert mental health care at Athans and Associates , where our dedicated team is ready to help you regain confidence and reclaim your life.

About the Author

Amanda Henderson ⎸ amanda@safechildren.info

Safe Children

Feeling Sad, Stuck and Tired in the Winter? How Seasonal Affective Disorder Impacts Mental Health

Mon, 27 Oct 2025 14:33:43 GMT

During the cold, dark months of winter, it’s common to feel sad, stuck or tired. But when do you know if it’s more than just “winter blues” or “cabin fever”? When these symptoms are persistent and getting in the way of daily functioning, it could be a sign of seasonal affective disorder (SAD) , a form of depression tied to seasonal changes during the fall and winter months.

SAD is relatively common— around 10 million Americans annually will experience SAD. Factors such as location and gender can increase one’s likelihood. In fact, females are four times more likely to be diagnosed with SAD.

SAD symptoms usually present in the fall and winter due to the reduction in daylight , and can last up to 40% of the year. Less commonly, some may experience SAD during the spring and summer months.

Is seasonal affective disorder the same as depression?

Seasonal affective disorder is a form of depression. What makes SAD different is that symptoms typically subside with the change of season. In the latest version of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, SAD is diagnosed as major depressive disorder with seasonal pattern.

Some of the risk factors for SAD are:

Location: Higher latitudes and regions with long winters tend to have a higher prevalence of SAD.
Gender: Women are more often diagnosed with SAD.
Pre-existing mental or physical health conditions: A history of conditions like depression, anxiety, or hyperthyroidism can increase your risk.

What causes seasonal affective disorder?

It’s believed that a lack of sunlight is one of the main causes of SAD. Shorter days, especially if you live somewhere far from the equator, lead to less sunlight exposure. This can impact brain chemicals that regulate mood.

Circadian rhythms may also be disrupted by this decrease in sunlight, which can impact sleep patterns. Some studies have indicated vitamin D deficiency is linked mood disorders in the winter months. The sun is a natural source of vitamin D, so reduced sun exposure in the winter months can lead to a vitamin D deficiency.

What are the symptoms of seasonal affective disorder?

Feeling sad or depressed
Changes in sleep patterns (oversleeping or insomnia, difficulty waking up in the morning)
Changes in appetite, especially craving carbs
Fluctuations in weight
Difficulty thinking, concentrating or making decisions
Reduced interest in activities
Feeling worthless or guilty
Suicidal ideation

Treatment for seasonal affective disorder

There are a variety of evidence-based treatments for seasonal affective disorder. Some common and effective treatments are:

Psychotherapy: Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) as a common treatment for SAD. Many of our therapists use a CBT approach in their treatment.
Light Therapy: The use of light boxes to simulate sunlight exposure.
Medication: Antidepressants can reduce symptoms and help regulate mood.
Lifestyle changes: Exercise, a balanced diet, and maintaining a consistent sleep schedule can help.
Vitamin D supplements: There are proven benefits of increasing vitamin D intake through supplements or foods.
Social support: Stay connected with loved ones and seek support from groups or mental health professionals .
Self-Care: Spend time outdoors during daylight, engage in activities that bring joy, and practice mindfulness.

Seasonal affective disorder is treatable.

The earlier you seek treatment, the better. Connect with a provider at Athans & Associates to seek help for you or a loved one. If you are currently experiencing suicidal thoughts, seek emergency help or call 988, the suicide and crisis lifeline.

About the Author

How ADHD Impacts Planning, Memory and Setting Goals

Tue, 14 Oct 2025 14:49:43 GMT

Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) is often associated with difficulties in attention, hyperactivity, and impulsivity. One of the most significant aspects of ADHD is its impact on executive functioning skills — the mental processes that help individuals plan, tell time, remember details, and complete tasks.

What Are Executive Functioning Skills?

Executive functioning refers to a set of cognitive abilities that allow us to manage our thoughts, actions, and emotions to achieve goals. These skills include:

Planning and prioritizing
Time management
Task initiation and follow-through
Working memory
Emotional regulation
Impulse control
Organization

When executive functioning is impaired, even simple daily activities can become challenging.

How ADHD Affects Executive Functioning

Individuals with ADHD often experience consistent struggles in the following areas:

1. Working Memory Challenges. Working memory allows a person to hold and manipulate information in their mind for short periods. ADHD can impair this ability, leading to:

Forgetting instructions shortly after hearing them
Losing track of what one is doing mid-task
Difficulty following multi-step processes

2. Time Management Difficulties. Many people with ADHD struggle with “time blindness,” where the perception of time is inconsistent or inaccurate. This can result in:

Chronic procrastination
Underestimating how long tasks will take
Trouble meeting deadlines
Frequently being late

3. Problems with Task Initiation. Getting started on tasks — especially those perceived as boring, difficult, or unclear — can be a major obstacle. This might look like:

Delaying important responsibilities
Feeling mentally "stuck" even when the task is understood
Needing external pressure (like a deadline) to begin working

4. Disorganization and Difficulty Planning. Organizing materials, thoughts, and schedules can be particularly challenging. This often results in:

Frequently misplacing items
Difficulty maintaining a calendar or routine
Trouble breaking large tasks into manageable steps

5. Impulse Control and Emotional Regulation

Executive functioning also plays a role in how we regulate our behavior and emotions. ADHD may lead to:

Interrupting conversations or speaking out of turn
Emotional outbursts or difficulty calming down
Reacting without thinking through consequences

Supporting Executive Functioning in ADHD

Managing executive dysfunction related to ADHD involves understanding these challenges and implementing targeted strategies, such as:

Using visual schedules, checklists, and reminders
Breaking tasks into smaller, more manageable parts
Creating structured routines
Practicing mindfulness and emotional awareness techniques
Seeking professional support through therapy, coaching, or medication

Executive functioning challenges are a core feature of ADHD and can significantly affect daily life, work, and relationships. These difficulties are not due to a lack of effort or motivation, but rather the way the ADHD brain processes information and tasks.

With the right tools, strategies, and support, individuals with ADHD can strengthen their executive functioning skills and improve overall functioning and well-being. The mental health professionals at Athans and Associates are trained to understand and treat children and adults struggling with ADHD. Reach out today if you’re interested in scheduling a session .

About the Author

What’s the Difference Between OCD and Anxiety?

Mon, 15 Sep 2025 21:31:30 GMT

If you’ve ever wondered whether you or someone you care about is dealing with anxiety, OCD, or maybe both — you’re not alone. These two can look pretty similar on the surface. After all, both can involve worry, fear, and racing thoughts. But when you take a closer look, there are some important differences between the two.

First, What Is Anxiety?

Anxiety is a normal part of being human. It’s our brain’s way of protecting us from danger — think of it as an internal alarm system. But for people with anxiety disorders, that alarm goes off too often, even when there’s no real threat.

People with anxiety might experience:

Excessive worry about the future
Physical symptoms (racing heart, sweating, restlessness)
Trouble sleeping or concentrating
Fear of bad things happening, even when everything seems okay

Common anxiety disorders include Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD), panic disorder, social anxiety, and more. The worries might center around health, work, relationships, or just everyday life.

So, What About OCD?

OCD, or Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, is also rooted in anxiety — but it works in a specific, patterned way.

OCD involves two key pieces:

Obsessions – unwanted, intrusive thoughts, images, or urges that cause distress
Compulsions – repetitive behaviors or mental rituals done to try to “neutralize” the anxiety caused by the obsession

Here’s an example: Someone might have an intrusive thought like “What if I accidentally harmed someone?” (obsession). To relieve the anxiety from that thought, they might check the stove 10 times to make sure it’s off (compulsion).

Other common compulsions include:

Excessive cleaning or handwashing
Repeatedly checking things
Mentally reviewing events over and over
Repeating phrases or numbers “just right”

The key difference is that in OCD, there’s often a loop: a thought → anxiety → a ritual to try to feel safe again.

But Don’t People with Anxiety Worry Too?

Yes, absolutely. Both OCD and anxiety involve worry — but in OCD, the worry is usually:

Very specific (e.g., fear of contamination, moral “wrongdoing,” or causing harm)
Tied to a ritual or behavior meant to reduce the anxiety
Experienced as intrusive and unwanted — something the person doesn’t want to think

In contrast, anxiety tends to be more general and broad, like:

“What if I mess up at work?”
“What if something bad happens to my family?”
“What if I never feel better?”

And while anxiety might cause people to avoid things, it usually doesn’t involve repetitive rituals like OCD does.

Can You Have Both?

Yes, and many people do. OCD is an anxiety disorder, so the two often overlap. But understanding the difference can help with getting the right treatment, since therapy approaches for generalized anxiety and OCD can be different.

If you’re noticing repetitive thoughts and behaviors that feel hard to control, or if worry is interfering with your daily life, it’s worth reaching out to a mental health professional. OCD and anxiety are both treatable, and you don’t have to navigate them alone. The professionals at Athans & Associates are trained to work with both OCD and anxiety; reach out today.

About the Author

Courtney Griffin is a Professional Counselor at Athans & Associates. She works with children and adults, and has a Master’s Degree in Clinical Mental Health Counseling from DePaul University.

5 Common Myths About Couples Counseling

Tue, 09 Sep 2025 19:19:52 GMT

When people hear “couples counseling,” a lot of assumptions pop up. The idea of sitting in a room with your partner and a therapist might sound intimidating, unnecessary, or like a last resort. But in reality, couples counseling can be a healthy, proactive tool for building stronger relationships — not just fixing broken ones.

Let’s clear up some of the most common myths.

Myth #1: Couples Counseling Is Only for Failing Relationships

This is probably the biggest misconception. People often think you only go to counseling when you're one step away from breaking up or divorcing.

Reality: Many couples go to therapy to prevent problems, not just fix them. Counseling can help with communication, navigating life transitions (like having a baby or moving), or simply understanding each other better. You don’t have to be in crisis to benefit.

Myth #2: The Therapist Will Take Sides

Some people worry that the counselor will “team up” with one partner or blame one person for the problems.

Reality: A good couples therapist remains neutral. Their role is to help both partners feel heard, identify patterns, and improve understanding — not assign blame. The focus is on the relationship dynamic, not who’s “right” or “wrong.”

Myth #3: It’s Just a Lot of Talking About Feelings

While emotions definitely come up, couples counseling isn’t just sitting around dissecting every feeling or going in circles about arguments.

Reality: Most couples therapy is structured, goal-oriented, and practical. You'll learn tools for communication, conflict resolution, setting boundaries, and reconnecting. It's about action just as much as insight.

Myth #4: If You Need Therapy, You’re Doomed Anyway

This one is especially damaging. People often see therapy as the “last chance” and assume that going means your relationship has already failed.

Reality: Seeking help shows commitment, not failure. In fact, couples who go to counseling early tend to have better outcomes. It’s a sign that both partners are willing to work on the relationship — which is a strength, not a weakness.

Myth #5: The Therapist Will Fix Everything for You

It’s easy to think that the therapist is there to magically solve all your problems.

Reality: The therapist is a guide, not a fixer. They’ll help you see things more clearly, learn new tools, and create a safe space for honest conversations. But real change comes from both partners putting in the effort — both in and outside of sessions.

Couples counseling isn’t about airing dirty laundry or proving who's at fault. It's about understanding, growth, and connection. Whether you're struggling with big issues or just feeling a little disconnected, therapy can be a valuable way to strengthen your bond.

The mental health professionals at Athans and Associates are trained to understand and treat couples looking to resolve conflicts and deepen their relationship. Reach out today if you’re interested in scheduling a session with your partner .

About the Author

Courtney Griffin is a Professional Counselor at Athans & Associates. She works with children and adults, and has a Master’s Degree in Clinical Mental Health Counseling from DePaul University.

You Can Overcome Imposter Syndrome: How to Recognize the Signs and Reclaim Your Confidence

Wed, 06 Aug 2025 15:58:58 GMT

Imposter syndrome has a way of sneaking in, even when your achievements tell a different story. You can feel capable one minute and like a complete fraud the next, questioning whether you truly belong where you are. It’s a quiet, internal struggle that can leave you second-guessing every compliment or accomplishment. Understanding this mental pattern is the first step toward breaking free. By noticing the signals and creating deliberate habits, you can reshape how you see yourself.

Recognizing the Subtle Signs

Imposter syndrome often shows itself in sneaky, persistent ways. You might experience a sense of being a fraud even when you’ve worked hard and earned every ounce of success. For some, it surfaces as perfectionism, where nothing ever feels good enough, no matter how polished the result. Others constantly compare themselves to peers, convinced they fall short in every category. These thoughts aren’t fleeting; they can show up daily and affect how you interact with opportunities. Recognizing these feelings for what they are—misleading signals rather than truth—makes it possible to challenge them. Awareness is a powerful starting point because it helps you separate real feedback from internal noise. Once you can name the signs, you’re better equipped to address them.

Mapping the Emotional Cycle

A key feature of imposter syndrome is its repetitive emotional loop. Many experience what’s often called the imposter syndrome cycle, a spiral of over-preparing, pushing yourself too hard, and then attributing success to luck instead of skill . This cycle reinforces the belief that you’re never good enough, setting the stage for constant burnout. When you overcompensate, any positive outcome feels less like a win and more like a fluke, making the cycle spin faster. By understanding this pattern, you can start breaking it with deliberate pauses and self-reflection. Interrupting the cycle might involve giving yourself credit for small wins instead of downplaying them. Acknowledging effort, not just results, is crucial to creating a more balanced perspective.

Building a Dynamic Self-Reflection Tool

One way to combat self-doubt is by creating a personal journal or workbook designed to track your growth over time. You can easily add pages to PDF to build a living document of affirmations, coping strategies, and reflections. This evolving resource allows you to look back on your progress, especially during moments when doubt clouds your memory of how far you’ve come. A custom workbook can hold daily journaling prompts, space for gratitude lists, or even a section dedicated to reframing negative thoughts. By regularly adding new insights, it becomes a tangible reminder of your achievements. The structure also encourages habit-building, reinforcing positive behaviors that help dismantle the imposter narrative.

Celebrating Progress and Evidence

Taking the time to recognize your achievements helps silence the inner critic. Rather than brushing off praise or moving straight to the next challenge, pause to notice what you’ve accomplished. Keep a simple list of wins, whether it’s solving a tough problem, learning a new skill, or finishing a project, and revisit it regularly. The more you sit with these moments, the more you train yourself to accept success as earned rather than accidental. Embracing these truths isn’t about arrogance; it’s about honoring the real effort behind your growth. Over time, acknowledging your victories becomes a practice of self-respect that reinforces lasting confidence.

Investing in Your Skills

Sometimes imposter syndrome thrives on the belief that you’re not qualified enough, even if that belief isn’t true. One way to silence that inner critic is by actively building new skills or expanding your expertise. For example, pursuing an online computer science degree or other structured programs can not only increase your technical know-how but also give you a renewed sense of accomplishment. Online degrees make it easier to balance full-time work with continued learning, offering flexibility without sacrificing quality. As you progress, every class or project becomes a small victory that chips away at self-doubt. This investment in yourself sends a powerful message: you’re capable of mastering complex subjects and taking on bigger challenges.

Reframing Self-Talk

Changing the language you use with yourself is a powerful way to fight imposter syndrome. Incorporating positive affirmations to rewire your mindset can gradually shift your inner narrative. Instead of saying “I’m not good enough,” you start training your brain to acknowledge effort and progress. This isn’t just about repeating uplifting phrases, it’s about aligning your thoughts with reality and giving yourself the same kindness you’d extend to a friend. Over time, consistent reframing of self-talk can reduce the emotional weight of setbacks and challenges. Pairing affirmations with action, like revisiting your workbook or celebrating milestones, makes these shifts stick. Words have power, and choosing better ones can significantly reshape how you see yourself.

Seeking Professional Support

Sometimes overcoming imposter syndrome requires an outside perspective. Speaking with a licensed therapist can offer insights you might not uncover on your own. Services like Athans and Associates provide a safe space to explore the roots of self-doubt and develop coping strategies tailored to you. Therapy can help identify thought patterns that keep you stuck and replace them with healthier, more constructive beliefs. A therapist can also guide you in setting realistic goals, managing perfectionism, and finding sustainable confidence. Professional support isn’t a sign of weakness; it’s an investment in your mental well-being. Having someone skilled to walk you through the process of rebuilding self-trust can be transformative.

Imposter syndrome thrives in silence, feeding on the gap between perception and reality. By recognizing its symptoms, documenting your progress, and building habits that reinforce self-worth, you can break its grip. Overcoming this mindset isn’t about perfection, it’s about progress, perspective, and patience. Each small step, from celebrating achievements to reshaping self-talk, builds a stronger foundation of confidence. As you continue to challenge these false narratives, you’ll see that your capabilities have been there all along, waiting for you to trust them.

About the Author

Amanda Henderson ⎸ amanda@safechildren.info

Safe Children

Does Your Child Dread Back-to-School Time? 6 Tips to Help Your Child This Year

Tue, 29 Jul 2025 05:00:00 GMT

As summer break wraps up and the school year starts inches closer, many children (and parents!) begin to feel a mix of excitement and stress. While back-to-school season is a time for fresh starts and new opportunities, it’s not always that simple — especially when it comes to mental health.

Whether your child is starting kindergarten, moving up to middle school, or returning after a tough year, back-to-school anxiety is normal—and something you can help them manage.

If your child is going into 3rd, 4th, or 5th grade and is experiencing anxiety for the school year ahead, enroll in our Back to School Bootcamp!

What Is Back-to-School Anxiety?

Back-to-school anxiety is the worry kids feel leading up to or during the early days of returning to school. It can show up in different ways depending on the child, including:

Crying or irritability on school nights or in the morning before school
Refusing to go to school or trying to get out of school (pretending to be sick, etc.)
Trouble sleeping or changes in appetite
Complaints of stomach aches or headaches
Clinginess or refusing to leave the house
Worrying out loud (“What if no one likes me?” or “What if I get lost?”)

These feelings are most common during transitions—like starting a new grade, changing schools, or returning after summer or winter break—but they can happen to any child, even those who usually enjoy school.

Why Does Anxiety Happen When Kids Go Back to School?

A new school year brings change, and change can be scary—even when it’s exciting. Some common triggers for back-to-school anxiety include:

Fear of the unknown: New classrooms, teachers, and expectations.
Academic pressure: Worry about grades, homework, or keeping up with classmates.
Social worries: Making friends or dealing with past social struggles.
Separation anxiety: Especially for younger kids or those starting school for the first time.
Previous challenges: A rough experience last year can carry over into new anxiety.

How to Help Your Child Manage Back-to-School Anxiety

The good news? Most kids settle in within the first few weeks of school. But there’s plenty you can do to ease the transition:

1. Talk about it early

Give your child time to express their worries. Ask open-ended questions like, “What are you thinking about when school comes up?” Listen without jumping in to fix everything right away.

2. Practice routines

Start the school bedtime and morning routine about a week before school starts. It helps reset their internal clock and removes some stress from the first day.

3. Visit the school (if possible)

Walk around, find the classroom, meet the teacher—anything that makes the place feel more familiar and less intimidating.

4. Focus on the positives

Talk about the fun parts of school: seeing friends, art class, recess, or even a cool lunchbox.

5. Teach coping skills to help them self-regulate

Practice deep breathing, stretching, or short mindfulness exercises they can use when feeling anxious.

6. Be calm and confident

Kids pick up on your mood. Parents can be powerful models. A reassuring tone from you helps them believe everything will be okay.

When to Seek Extra Help

If the anxiety doesn’t fade after a few weeks or seems to be getting worse, it might be time to check in with a school counselor, pediatrician, or therapist. Ongoing anxiety could be a sign of a deeper issue, like an anxiety disorder.

If your child is struggling with the onset of the school year, contact Athans & Associates . Our clinicians are trained to work with school age children.

About the Author

Courtney Griffin is a Professional Counselor at Athans & Associates. She works with children and adults, and has a Master’s Degree in Clinical Mental Health Counseling from DePaul University.

Separation Anxiety in Kids: What It Is and How to Help

Tue, 22 Jul 2025 05:00:00 GMT

If you’ve ever had a child cling to you at school drop-off, cry when you head out the door, or beg you not to leave them, you’re not alone. These moments can be heartbreaking, but they’re also very common. That fear your child feels when they’re away from you? That’s called separation anxiety.

Let’s talk about what it is, why it happens, and how you can help your child through it.

What Is Separation Anxiety in Kids?

Separation anxiety is a normal part of child development, especially in younger children. It usually kicks in between 6 months and 3 years old when kids start to understand that people exist even when they’re not in the room. The problem? They’re not yet sure you’ll come back.

Most kids outgrow this stage, but for some, the anxiety sticks around longer or shows up more intensely. When it starts to interfere with school, activities, or daily life, it might be more than just a phase.

Common Signs of Separation Anxiety

It looks a little different in every child, but here are some typical signs to watch for:

Crying or tantrums when a parent leaves
Constant worry about something bad happening to themselves or a parent or caregiver when they are separated
Clinging tightly during goodbyes
Refusing to go to school or daycare, or refusal to fall asleep without the parent or caregiver
Nightmares about being lost or separated
Physical complaints like stomach aches or headaches

Some anxiety is totally normal—but if it’s strong, ongoing, or starts happening out of the blue in older kids, it’s worth paying closer attention.

Why Do Some Kids Struggle More Than Others?

There are a few reasons a child might have more intense separation anxiety:

Temperament : Some kids are naturally more sensitive or cautious.
Major life changes : Moving, divorce, a new sibling, or starting a new school can all trigger anxiety.
Past experiences : A scary event, illness, or sudden loss can make kids fear separation more.
Parenting style : Overprotectiveness or inconsistent routines can sometimes add to the anxiety (no judgement—these styles are very common!).

How You Can Help Your Child Cope with Separation Anxiety

The good news? There’s a lot you can do to help your child feel safe and more confident during separations.

Try these tips:

Keep goodbyes short and sweet : Long, drawn-out farewells can make things harder.
Create a goodbye ritual : A special handshake, hug, or phrase can offer comfort.
Stick to a routine : Predictable schedules help kids feel more secure.
Practice short separations : Start small and build up. For example, leave your child with a relative for 10 minutes and gradually increase the time.
Stay calm and confident : Kids take emotional cues from you. If you look worried, they’ll feel worried too.
Avoid sneaking out : Always say goodbye. It builds trust that you’ll leave and come back.

When to Get Help

If your child’s separation anxiety is extreme, lasts longer than a few weeks, or is interfering with school or social life, consider talking to a pediatrician or child therapist. They can help rule out Separation Anxiety Disorder and guide you toward the right support. The clinicians at Athans & Associates can help if your child is dealing with separation anxiety.

Separation anxiety can be tough—for kids and parents. But it’s a normal part of growing up, and with patience, reassurance, and the right tools, your child can learn to feel safe and confident even when you’re not right there beside them.

About the Author

Courtney Griffin is a Professional Counselor at Athans & Associates. She works with children and adults, and has a Master’s Degree in Clinical Mental Health Counseling from DePaul University.

Create a New You: Steps to Personal Growth and Positive Energy

Tue, 10 Jun 2025 22:51:04 GMT

Reinventing oneself is not merely about change; it’s about embracing a path that leads to personal and professional growth. This journey requires courage and a willingness to explore new avenues, whether in your career or personal life. By adopting innovative tools and mindsets, you can foster a sense of empowerment that propels you forward. The process involves more than just setting goals; it’s about cultivating an environment that supports your aspirations and aligns with your values. As you begin this transformative journey, consider the strategies that will best support your unique path.

Develop a Growth Mindset

Adopting a growth mindset is essential for personal empowerment. This mindset encourages you to view challenges as opportunities for learning. By embracing this perspective, you can develop resilience and adaptability, crucial traits for personal growth. For instance, when faced with a setback, consider it a temporary hurdle rather than an insurmountable barrier. This shift in thinking can boost your motivation and determination, ultimately leading to a more fulfilling life.

Use Positive Affirmations

Positive affirmations can be a powerful tool for transformation. By regularly engaging with affirmations, you can shift your mindset from negativity to positivity , enhancing your confidence and reducing anxiety. Tailor these affirmations to align with your personal values and goals, and integrate them into your daily routine for maximum impact.

An Empowering Environment Spurs Self-Discovery

The spaces we occupy and the people we surround ourselves with shape the way we see ourselves. A supportive environment encourages growth by fostering confidence, curiosity, and a willingness to explore new possibilities. When positivity surrounds us, self-doubt fades, making room for deeper self-awareness and a stronger sense of direction. Every conversation, habit, and experience within that space becomes a stepping stone toward self-discovery. Creating or seeking out uplifting surroundings allows personal transformation to unfold naturally.

New You, New Career

Changing careers is a chance to realign your work with your passions and strengths, opening the door to fresh opportunities. Stepping into something new takes courage, adaptability, and a willingness to learn. Crafting a strong resume can make the transition smoother, and using an AI resume builder application helps create a polished, professional document quickly. The tool provides personalized suggestions based on user prompts and questions, ensuring your experience is presented effectively. With the right mindset and preparation, a career change becomes a powerful step toward personal and professional growth.

Begin to Build Your Personal Brand

Defining your personal brand is a powerful way to align your transformation with your values and goals. It starts with understanding what you stand for and how you want to be seen, then shaping your message through actions, words, and presence. Consistency in how you present yourself builds trust and confidence, reinforcing the new path you’re creating. Whether through communication, appearance, or the energy you bring to interactions, every choice becomes a reflection of your evolving identity. Owning your narrative allows you to step into your transformation with clarity and purpose.

Find Healthy Ways to Become More Resilient

Building resilience starts with habits that strengthen both mind and body , creating a foundation for lasting growth. Practices like mindfulness, movement, and meaningful connections provide stability during life’s unpredictable moments. Challenges become opportunities when approached with a mindset that values progress over perfection. Learning to adapt with patience and self-compassion turns setbacks into stepping stones rather than barriers. The more you nurture resilience, the easier it becomes to move forward with confidence and clarity.

Lean Into Your Fears

Facing fears head-on creates a sense of control that strengthens confidence with every step forward. Avoidance keeps uncertainty alive, while action turns fear into a challenge rather than a limitation. Each time you push past discomfort, you prove to yourself that you are capable of handling more than you once believed. Growth happens in those moments of courage, where self-doubt is replaced by a deeper trust in your own abilities. Overcoming fear isn’t about eliminating it—it’s about moving forward despite it.

The journey of reinvention is a continuous process of growth and self-discovery. By embracing new strategies and perspectives, you can foster a life filled with empowerment and purpose. Each step you take toward transformation not only enhances your personal and professional life but also enriches your overall well-being.

Discover compassionate and expert mental health care for all ages at Athans and Associates , where our dedicated team is ready to help you regain confidence and reclaim your life.

Practical Strategies for a Balanced and Stress-Free Life

Mon, 27 Jan 2025 17:46:01 GMT

Photo via Pexels

In today’s fast-paced world, stress can often feel like an unavoidable companion. However, with the right strategies, it’s possible to cultivate a life that prioritizes mental well-being and balance. Whether it’s through career adjustments, effective time management, or embracing relaxation techniques, there are numerous ways to mitigate stress. In this article, we’ll go over several things you can do to minimize stress and feel better each day.

Pinpoint Your Stress Areas

Journaling is a powerful tool for tracking daily stress triggers and identifying patterns over time, enabling you to better understand and manage your stress. By dedicating a few minutes each day to write about your thoughts, feelings, and experiences, you can pinpoint specific situations, people, or environments that consistently cause stress. Over time, reviewing these entries reveals recurring patterns, such as times of day, particular tasks, or emotional responses linked to stress. This awareness allows you to take targeted action, such as adjusting your routine, setting boundaries, or implementing stress-reduction strategies.

Transform Your Career

If your current job feels like a constant source of stress, it might be time to consider a career change. Shifting to a new field can be a transformative way to manage stress and improve your mental health. Online degree programs make it easier than ever to pursue further education while maintaining your full-time job or family responsibilities. For example, if you have experience in the healthcare field, earning a master’s degree in nursing allows you to take a hands-on role in diagnosing and treating patients, providing a fulfilling and engaging career path. Read up on the benefits of nurse practitioner online programs if you’re interested in making a positive career change.

Make Your Goals Realistic

Setting realistic goals that align with your core objectives is essential for managing stress effectively. By focusing on achievable targets , you can avoid the overwhelming feeling of having too much on your plate, which often leads to stress and burnout. Quality is more important than quantity; setting a few meaningful goals can be more beneficial than a long list of unattainable ones. Attaching deadlines to your goals can help maintain momentum, but be cautious not to fall into the trap of constantly extending them.

Learn Time Management

Time management is a powerful tool for reducing stress and enhancing mental health. Studies show that individuals who excel in managing their time often experience less depression and anxiety. By setting clear goals, organizing tasks, and assessing progress, you can alleviate the pressures of time poverty and work intensification. Although research on time management interventions is still evolving, there’s a clear negative correlation between poor time management and mental health issues like sleep disturbances and anxiety. Improving your time management skills not only boosts productivity but also fosters a healthier mental state.

Embrace Relaxation Techniques

Incorporating relaxation techniques such as deep breathing and mindfulness meditation into your daily routine can be a powerful way to manage stress. Deep breathing, or abdominal breathing, involves taking slow, deliberate breaths to clear your mind and foster calmness. Mindfulness meditation, on the other hand, involves sitting comfortably and focusing on your breath, helping to center your mind and reduce stress. Dedicating at least 20 minutes a day to these practices can build a reservoir of tranquility to draw upon whenever stress arises.

Discover New Hobbies

Exploring new hobbies can be a powerful way to diversify your sources of relaxation and enhance your overall well-being. Engaging in activities like playing an instrument, gardening, painting, cooking, or crocheting can help you shut out the world and focus on something enjoyable. By incorporating these diverse hobbies into your routine, you can find a balance between relaxation and personal development , ultimately leading to a more fulfilling life.

Consider Therapy

Sometimes, feelings of stress can be so overwhelming that it’s impossible to manage them on our own. When that happens, it’s a good idea to ask for help . Professional therapists and counselors can assist you in finding triggers and managing difficult emotions when they arrive. They can help you figure out healthy coping mechanisms even when you feel they’re out of reach. You can even attend sessions from the comfort of your home, potentially improving the therapeutic experience by providing familiar surroundings. The discrete nature of online therapy also helps maintain privacy, which is crucial for individuals concerned about stigma in close-knit communities.

Incorporating these strategies into your daily life can significantly enhance your mental well-being and reduce stress. The journey to a stress-free life is personal and ongoing, but with commitment and the right tools, it is entirely achievable.

Unlock a world of insights and expertise by requesting an appointment with professional behavioral health care consultants Athans & Associates today.

The Emotional Effects of Covid-19

Thu, 01 Oct 2020 12:04:01 GMT

The Covid-19 virus is dated 2019 but came to us in a big way by February,2020 and continues to have a major impact in our lives. We have learned some things about the virus since then, but more so about how it has impacted us.

The required social isolation/distancing has affected our lives to a great extent, changing our work, school, and social time a great deal. Adults have been required to work from home in order to avoid physical contact with others. This means eight to ten hours per day on the computer using videoconferencing software to be in contact with staff, clients, etc. Students, too, struggle with no contact outside the home, video conferencing all day long, sometimes with structure and direction, sometimes wondering about somewhat aimlessly on the computer if there is less guidance. Parents often complain that they don’t have the time to supervise their kids on the computer, as they are concerned about doing their job. This is especially true at a time when some jobs are expendable due to a change in the economy created by…Covid -19.

Socialization is important to all us: adults, adolescents, children, toddlers, even animals! Have you noticed how your cat or dog shows you how they missed you when you were at work and returned home? Science tells us that socialization was even evident with the caveman.

Research shows that being social is an important part of our mental health. This is because talking, sharing thoughts and feelings allows us to “vent,” but also reminds us that we are not alone in solving those problems. Additionally, empathy given, and empathy received goes a long way. “I know how you feel” can be uplifting. Participating, observing one’s smile, laughing together reminds us that we are not alone. Socialization adds to our happiness and well-being.

Developmentally, children learn to trust at a young age. Sharing thoughts, feelings, toys, etc. means reaching out to others. They may get hurt emotionally, but then they learn more about relationships and eventually take more risks. Children learn and experience their family first-hand. Getting close, trusting, taking care of, etc. is all part of the process. So, the family is important socially, but our current-day society goes way beyond that. In recent times we spend more time out of the home than in the home (short of sleep time).

Social distancing and social isolation have immense personal consequences leading to symptoms of anxiety, stress, fear, sadness, depression and even helplessness and possible suicide.

When experiencing these symptoms, we often eat too much and irresponsibly, become lax in physical activity, at times, over-indulge in alcohol, drugs, etc., resulting in even more pronounced symptoms over time. The damage to our bodies and minds is incalculable. While you may have heard of some of these recommendations, do not overlook them. It is not so much all or nothing, rather work toward healthy lifestyles. The support of your partner and family working together will make it much more effective and pleasing to all.

Diet:

Eat three plus meals per day, graze as you need to, focus on protein and vegetables, etc.
Drink lots of water
Avoid alcohol/non-prescribed drugs

Physical Activity:

Exercise, Exercise, Exercise! Exercise can help with weight and many medical conditions such as high blood pressure, Type 2 diabetes, arthritis, muscle tone, mood, etc.

Coping strategies:

Focus on your strengths
Be thankful for what you have
Give yourself breaks
Keep your expectations in check
Plan social times; enjoy time with family, friends, others
Use humor
Maintain a regular schedule
Focus on what you have control over, and what you want to do about it, not what you don’t have control over
Maintain good sleep habits (no stimulation, regular sleep times)
Avoid too much media information, as it can consume your day and your thoughts and feelings, and you still don’t have control of what’s presented
Be good to yourself!

Michael At hans

Managing Stress and Anxiety during the Covid-19 pandemic

Tue, 21 Apr 2020 16:57:43 GMT

It’s natural that we become anxious and worried as we are clustered in our homes with the current “stay at home” government order. Worry and rumination are not uncommon, naturally wondering: Will we be ok? What about relatives, friends, neighbors who we can’t physically see so easily? There is a real sense of loss of control.

It is not uncommon for our sleep, appetite, and mood to be affected. There may be increased use of alcohol, tobacco or other drugs. Sometimes existing health problems are exacerbated. We may feel pre-occupied, “spacey,” etc.

People react differently to stressful situations depending on their constitutional make up, personal circumstances, coping styles and support systems. What do you have control over?

Some ways to take care of yourself and your family:

Eating

Eating healthy, balanced meals. Not over-eating or over-indulging. Avoid too many carbohydrates, sugars, alcohol as they create lethargy. While baking and cooking are good in-door hobbies, we can easily put on the weight.

Exercise

Exercise is always healthy. Walking, riding bikes outside is a great way to get fresh air, enjoy your surroundings, say “Hello” to others, etc. Other forms of exercise such as aerobics, muscle tone, etc. are also good for us.

Coping Skills

There are many ways to improve coping skills. To start, it’s important to learn how to pay attention to your body, recognizing physical symptoms early enough so that you have more control to manage symptoms. There are a variety of interventions. You may appreciate some more than others.

Deep breathing – A series of long, deep breaths from your diaphragm.
Meditation – Meditation is the habitual process of training your mind to focus and redirect your thoughts. It can help with relaxation, retraining your mind, improved sleep, concentration. Meditation develops mental discipline and willpower and can help you avoid triggers for unwanted impulses.
Yoga – Yoga is a group of physical, mental, and spiritual practices or disciplines. There are many different forms, varying in intensity and style.
Tai Chi – A gentle physical exercise with stretching. Each posture flows into the next without pause, maintaining a constant motion.
Music – Listening to and appreciating music. There are many different styles and types of music which can affect our mood and disposition.

In short, let’s not feel helpless! There are lots of ways we can take care of ourselves!

Screen Time: How much is OK?

Tue, 22 May 2018 16:00:00 GMT

Most parents are familiar with the struggle of setting limits on the amount of screen time their children have each day. With so many gadgets – computers, TVs, smart phones, tablets, video game systems – children have a cornucopia of devices to choose from. Technology does have its merits and benefits. Smartboards are in many classrooms and a large amount of homework requires the use of a computer.

Although unlimited screen time may keep your children quiet, too much screen time is not good for kids. Several research studies have shown that too much screen time can have a detrimental effect on a child’s health – both mental and physical. Too much screen time can make it difficult for children to fall asleep at night. An overabundance of screen time can increase a child’s risk of attention problems, anxiety, and depression. Time spent on a screen is time not spent being active, raising a child’s risk of gaining too much weight. TV commercials and other screen ads can lead to unhealthy food choices. Food ads that are aimed at kids are often high in sugar, salt, or fats. Additionally, children tend to eat more when they are watching TV.

So how much screen time is too much?

The American Academy of Pediatrics has issued guidelines to help parents determine appropriate limits. Children under the age of two should have no screen time. For children over the age of two, limit screen time to two hours per day. Despite what ads may say, videos aimed towards young children do not improve their development.

However, most parents know that setting limits on the amount of television your child watches or how much time your teen spends playing video games is easier said than done! Here are some tips to help you limit screen time to a healthy, reasonable amount.

Model healthy electronics use. Before you binge watch your favorite Netflix series or scroll through your phone every free moment, remember that you are teaching your child bad habits. Consider limiting your own screen time to two hours per day.

E ducate yourself on technology. Kids today are tech savvy and often know more than adults about current technology. Try to stay on top of the newest trending apps and games. Make it a priority to stay educated so that you can set informed limits for your kids.

Create “technology free zones”. Establish zones in your home where you just don’t allow electronics, such as the dining room table or the car.

Set aside times to unplug. Set aside times for the whole family to unplug. For example, the dinner hour or the hour before bedtime can be a great time for the family to spend quality time together without the distraction of technology. You may even consider a longer “digital detox” for the whole family.

Use parental controls. Protect kids from explicit content on TV or online. Parental controls can also allow you to monitor what your children are viewing on TV or online.

Talk to kids about the dangers of too much screen time. Kids who understand, “It is not healthy to watch too much TV,” are less likely to try and break the rules than kids who think, “I can’t watch TV because my parents are mean.”

Obtain your child’s passwords. Depending on your child’s age and your values, it may make sense to obtain your child’s passwords to social media or online accounts. Many children lack the maturity to handle online problems, such as cyberbullying.

Encourage other activities. Children can quickly grow dependent on technology for entertainment. Get your child to play outside, read a book or play a game. Play with them and try out family game nights!

Make screen time a privilege. Screen time should be a privilege and not a right. Take away privileges, such as computer time, as a negative consequence. Once you have established a set amount of screen time, don’t allow kids to earn extra screen time as a reward. Stick to a daily limit and offer other low cost or free rewards.

Don’t allow screen media in your child’s bedroom. It’s harder to monitor your child’s screen media use if it is allowed in the bedroom. Additionally, hand held devices that children use at night can interfere with their sleep.

How do you set limits on screen time in your own home? Share your good ideas and thoughts below.

Phyllis Dawson, Psy.D.

Licensed Clinical Psychologist

Athans and Associates

32 Main Street, Park Ridge, IL 60068

www.athansandassociates.net

About the Author:

Dr. Phyllis Dawson is a licensed clinical psychologist. She is a senior clinician and has been affiliated with the practice for over 17 years. Dr. Dawson earned her doctorate degree in clinical psychology from the Illinois School of Professional Psychology. Dr. Dawson has extensive training in the assessment and treatment of individuals across the lifespan. Her treatments are research-based and proved to be effective. Each client’s treatment goals are individualized and discussed in order to be effective.

Dr. Dawson enjoys working with individuals and families. Clinical interests include depression, anxiety, women’s/girls’ issues, attention deficit, trauma, grief, anger, stress management, identity issues, suicide, chronic illness, and parenting.

Making The Most Out of Your Family Vacation

Tue, 17 Apr 2018 16:00:00 GMT

If the idea of a family vacation evokes mental images of a frazzled Clark Griswold, you’re not alone. Our daily routines feel safe and predictable and it’s not always easy to step away, especially when kids are involved. Nevertheless, these adventures provide valuable opportunities for families to practice compromise, adaptation, problem-solving, frustration tolerance, and of course, communication. What’s more, the benefits often outlast the actual experience. A successful family vacation has the potential to enrich a family’s identity and provide “happiness anchors” – a set of soothing memories to mentally recall when we are stressed or anxious. Keep in mind, a “successful” family vacation is not guaranteed and like most adventures, a little planning goes a long way. What follows are helpful tips to make the most of your time away:

Budget wisely : vacations aren’t cheap, and money is a top adult stressor.
Consider everyone’s needs: whether it’s dietary preferences or equitable time with the car radio, a predetermined strategy will decrease the chance of someone feeling left out.
Expect crankiness : a family-wide discussion of the inevitability of crankiness will better prepare the group for patience and support.
Be flexible : teamwork makes the dream work, and the best teams know how to compromise.
Unplug : the modern American family spends less quality time together than ever, and four people on their phones means four people in different worlds.
Don’t over-plan : “quality over quantity” may be the best philosophy for avoiding mental and physical exhaustion.
Check-in : periodic check-ins are a good way to increase cohesion and preempt meltdowns – e.g., “OK all, let’s quickly touch base: how are you feeling? Anyone need anything? Any grievances? What’s been the highlight of the day?”
Leave early : avoid the mad dash by giving yourself plenty of time to arrive to your destination.
Plan ahead : loosely discuss the next day’s itinerary the night before to allow everyone time to mentally prepare – this is especially helpful for children who may not transition from activity to activity as smoothly as adults.
Document : don’t allow it to distract from your here-and-now experience, but photos and videos allow for warm and positive recollections long after your return home.

Safe travels!

HOLIDAY STRESS

Tue, 28 Nov 2017 16:00:00 GMT

Holiday times remind us of special significance and meaning. Thanksgiving is an American tradition. It’s about being thankful for all that we have. Christmas, Hanukkah, Ramadan, Kwanzaa, and holidays at this time of year also have special meanings. Of course New Year’s is a celebration of the ending of the year, with all the excitement about ushering in a New Year and making resolutions.

For both the holidays and the New Year, we often set up expectations that are well-intentioned, but not realistic. Our goals may be too high, too general, or too long-term. We may be unable to maintain the commitment required, resulting in feelings of failure and low self-esteem. So, expectations need to be realistic, and a specific plan needs to be developed with short-term goals to maintain motivation. Meaningful rewards will reinforce our behavior, increasing the likelihood of its recurrence.

Holidays also tend to remind us of the past, including good and bad memories. Sibling rivalry issues may resurface at this time. Old family conflicts may also be replayed, resulting in hurt feelings, misunderstandings, and ultimate disappointment as we attempt to achieve approval from the ones we love.

Sad feelings may also be generated around holiday time, as we are reminded of those people who are no longer with us. This natural marker of time, which is often one of reflection, reminds us of the deaths, divorces, and changes which have occurred. The holidays may not be the way they used to be.

Overindulging ourselves and our children are sometimes subtle ways of compensating for these difficult feelings. Excessive gifts, drinking and eating are sometimes ways in which we attempt to “Take care of ourselves.” The ensuing result may feel overwhelming and out-of-control, however. Keep things in perspective. Find balance in life. Expression of our spirituality, paying attention to our needs, exercise, and sharing feelings with trusted people are good ways to begin.

Happy Holidays!

Suicide Awareness and Prevention

Tue, 19 Sep 2017 16:00:00 GMT

SEPTEMBER IS NATIONAL SUICIDE PREVENTION AND AWARENESS MONTH

We use this month to raise awareness, reach out to those affected by suicide and connect individuals with suicidal ideation to appropriate treatment services.

This is a time to share resources and stories in an effort to shed light on this highly stigmatized topic. It is important to ensure that individuals, friends and families have access to the resources they need to discuss suicide prevention. The feelings of shame and stigma associated with suicide may prevent people from talking openly. However, it is essential to note that having suicidal thoughts does not mean someone is weak or flawed.

While suicide prevention is important to address year-round, Suicide Prevention Awareness Month provides a dedicated time to come together with collective passion and strength around a difficult topic. The truth of the matter is we can all benefit from honest conversations about mental health conditions and suicide. Just one conversation can change a life.

The following provides various data and information about the statistics, warning signs, risk factors, and prevention tips for suicide. It also includes various crisis resources to utilize if needed.

STATISTICS

According to the National Alliance on Mental Illness, more than 41,000 individuals die by suicide each year, leaving behind thousands of friends and family members to navigate the tragedy of their loss.
Suicide is the 10th leading cause of death among adults in the U.S., and the 2nd leading cause of death among people aged 10-24
Firearms account for almost 50% of all suicides

WARNING SIGNS

Threats or comments about killing themselves, also known as suicidal ideation, can begin with seemingly harmless thoughts like “I wish I wasn’t here” but can become more overt and dangerous
Increased alcohol or drug use
Aggressive behavior
Social withdrawal from friends, family and the community
Dramatic mood swings
Talking, writing, or thinking about death
Impulsive or reckless behavior
Something to look out for when concerned that a person may be suicidal is a change in behavior or the presence of entirely new behaviors. This can be concerning if the new or changed behavior is related to a painful event, loss, or change. Most people who take their lives exhibit one or more warning signs, either through what they say or what they do

RISK FACTORS

Mental Illness. According the National Alliance on Mental Illness, research has found that about 90% of individuals who die by suicide experience mental illness
A family history of suicide
Substance abuse. Drugs and alcohol can result in mental highs and lows that exacerbate suicidal thoughts
Intoxication. More than one in three people who die from suicide are found to be currently under the influence
Access to firearms
A serious or chronic medical illness
Gender. Although more women than men attempt suicide, men are four times more likely to die by suicide
A history of trauma or abuse
Prolonged stress
Isolation
Age. People under age 24 or above age 65 are at higher risk for suicide
A recent tragedy or loss
Agitation or sleep deprivation
Previous suicide attempts
Exposure to another person’s suicide, or to graphic or sensationalized accounts of suicide

PREVENTION TIPS

It can be frightening and intimidating when a loved one reveals or shows signs of suicidal thoughts. However, not taking thoughts of suicide seriously can have a devastating outcome. If you think your friend or family member will hurt themselves or someone else, call 911 immediately
Mental health professional are trained to help a person understand their feelings and can improve mental wellness and resiliency. They can provide effective ways to help
Psychotherapy such as cognitive behavioral therapy and dialectical behavioral therapy, can help a person with thoughts of suicide recognize unhealthy patterns of thinking and behavior, validate troubling feelings, and learn coping skills
According to the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention, there are many small studies of various interventions, including promising short-term therapies that include the family, have also proven to be beneficial
Medication can be used if necessary to treat underlying depression and anxiety and can lower a person’s risk of hurting themselves. Depending on the person’s mental health diagnosis, other medications can be used to alleviate symptoms
Be Educated. One of the best things you can do if you know or suspect that your loved one is contemplating suicide is to educate yourself. Learning about suicide, what the warning signs are, and how it can be prevented can help you understand what you need to do as a member of their support system
Remove means such as guns, knives, or stockpiled pills
Talk openly and honestly about suicide. Don’t be afraid to ask questions.

CRISIS RESOURCES

If you or someone you know is in an emergency, call 911 immediately
If you are in crisis or are experiencing difficult or suicidal thoughts, call the National Suicide Hotline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255)
If you’re uncomfortable talking on the phone, you can also text NAMI to 741-741 to be connected to a free, trained crisis counselor on the Crisis Text Line

RESOURCES

National Alliance on Mental Illness

https://www.nami.org

American Foundation for Suicide Prevention

https://afsp.org/

Dr. Adam Share

Athans and Associates

Behavioral Health Care Consultants

32 Main Street, Park Ridge, IL 60068

www.Athansandassociates.net

(847) 823-4444

Parents – Back to School

Sun, 27 Aug 2017 16:00:00 GMT

Parents go back to school, like their children.

Parents have to reorganize the house, buy school supplies, buy clothes and uniforms for the kids, buy sport equipment, reorganize schedules, make doctor’s appointments, etc.

Parents have to arrange carpools, take kids to sports practices, games, tutors, homework, bedtimes.

Parents have their own jobs, the house, as well as the children to manage. This can be overwhelming and stressful. And we tend to take care of everyone else first.

We encourage you to take care of yourselves . Find work-life balance. Eat healthy foods. Pet the dog. Get enough sleep, Walk for a few minutes outside. Plan for child care. Read. Listen to music. Pray. Practice deep-breathing. Hug your spouse.

The healthier and happier you are…the better your family.

Dr. Lynda Behrendt

Licensed Clinical Psychologist

Athans and Associates

32 Main Street, Park Ridge, IL 60068

www.athansandassociates.net

(847) 823-4444

Summer Mental Health Tips for Children

Sun, 16 Jul 2017 16:00:00 GMT

It’s summer and…I’M BORED!!!

This is an all too familiar complaint for many parents. Summer is supposed to be laid-back, less stressful, and full of positive feelings, right? However, the transition from a structured schedule to the unstructured days of summer often can be challenging. This is especially true for children with anxiety, ADHD and autism spectrum disorders. Summer also tends to have a focus on being more social and this can lead to feelings of isolation for some children who struggle with depression or social challenges.

Here are some tips to be mindful of during the summer months:

While these strategies can be helpful, it is always a good idea to seek a mental health professional to keep any issues from worsening.

Violet Theodos, Ph.D.

Licensed Clinical Psychologist

Athans and Associates

32 Main Street, Park Ridge, IL 60068

www.AthansandAssociates.net

(847) 823-4444

Parenting on Purpose: Discipline

Sun, 18 Jun 2017 16:00:00 GMT

DISCLAIMER: This blog is not written by a psychologist with superpowers who has never become frustrated at her children. This blog is written by a real mom who recently caught herself yelling “Stop yelling at your sister!” …and the irony had her thinking, “Hmm. I could blog about that.”

When responding to our children’s negative behaviors, from minor infractions to blatant disobedience, it’s best to leave emotion out of it. If we get too frustrated by our children’s behavior or feel personally offended by it, our response is often more emotional than logical. A bit of mindfulness (being in the present moment without thinking about the past or future) can be useful here. When your child throws a tantrum, the focus should be on this one tantrum, not that it is his fifth tantrum over the past 2 weeks or that you have to get dinner ready in 30 minutes. Responding to the moment without the emotional baggage of what has happened or what needs to happen can free up our resources and allow us to approach the situation—and our children—more rationally.

Developing a plan for how to respond to negative behaviors is imperative. Similar to ordering from a menu at a restaurant, choice of discipline should be contemplated and intentional. (Unless you’re going to Superdawg. Then just always get a chocolate shake, no menu necessary.)

Devise a system that lays out some “undesirable” behaviors your child engages in (e.g., hitting, talking back, etc.) and an appropriate associated consequence (e.g., time out, removal of privilege, etc.). When initiating a behavior plan, start small. Choose one or two behaviors and appropriate consequences, write it down in a simple format, and review it with your children. It’s important for them to know that there are consequences for their negative behaviors and to have a basic understanding of the rules in the house. When the behavior occurs, impart the consequence; there should be no surprises for your child or for you.

A word of warning: it gets worse before it gets better. Children generally escalate their negative behavior to get what they want if their usual level of disobedience/noncompliance/pouting does not work. It’s your job to stick to the plan. If you do this consistently, the negative behavior will eventually subside. In addition, when parents are consistent, it is comforting to children: we show that we are predictable and that we mean what we say.

If you use time-outs as a consequence, here are a few pointers:

Here’s an example:

Remember—we all get heated when our children do, but their frustration is not the stomach flu; it does not have to be contagious. Take a breath, deliver the consequence, and then give yourself permission to disengage while your child is in their time-out. They might scream and yell as part of their cool-down process, and that’s OK. Go take a sip of your chocolate shake.

For additional information on mindfulness in parenting, see my blog from March 2016

Jillian Wickery, Ph.D.

Licensed Clinical Psychologist

Athans and Associates

32 Main Street, Park Ridge, IL 60068

www.AthansandAssociates.net

(847) 823-4444

When in Doubt, Talk It Out!

Thu, 20 Apr 2017 16:00:00 GMT

Humans have communicated via storytelling for thousands of years. Prior to the codification of language, non-verbal acts such as pantomime were used to inspire, educate, and entertain. The advent of language allowed for a more refined method of addressing some of life’s most pressing questions.

Within the process of storytelling, both the teller and the listener are thought to benefit. The former is given an opportunity to share, while the latter may find comfort in the connection. Case in point: my first-ever concert was legendary blues guitarist B.B. King at the long-gone Poplar Creek Music Theater. As was typical, he opened the show with his classic tale of woe, The Thrill Is Gone. As he bellowed such lines as “the thrill is gone away from me / although I’ll still live on / so lonely I will be,” the crowd erupted with cheers of approval as the storyteller put words and melody to a universally relatable feeling.

Recent findings from UCLA’s Social Cognitive Neuroscience Laboratory appear to support this idea. This research team found that when participants were shown photos of angry faces, the region of the brain that prepares us to defend ourselves exhibited increased activity. When participants were then asked to verbally assign descriptive words such as “angry” or “mad” to the images, the same area of the brain appeared to cool. In the words of UCLA psychologist Matthew Lieberman, “This is ancient wisdom, but now we can verify it with brain mapping.”

It appears that both “The King Of The Blues” and these Bruin Brainiac’s support the idea that emotionally-rich expressions have therapeutic benefits. So how can we apply this to our lives? It’s not as easy as it would seem. Within families, effective communication allows us to better understand and connect with those around us. Unfortunately, the chaotic crisscross of daily life often leaves little time for meaningful connections.

A few tips:

For many families, communication is a skill that must be developed and updated over time. The “rules of engagement” that children learn from their families will likely follow them into future relationships. If you feel that you or your family could use guidance in this area, the internet is jam-packed with helpful resources. If you’d prefer a personalized approach, family therapists are experts in this area. Remember: with children in particular, opportunities to connect dwindle as time goes on − consider these tips to make the most of each moment.

WRITTEN BY:
JAMES LIGGETT, PSY.D.

LICENSED CLINICAL PSYCHOLOGIST

Spring Forward with more Steps!

Thu, 16 Mar 2017 16:00:00 GMT

With winter coming to an end (hopefully!) and spring approaching, what better way to ‘Spring Forward’ than incorporating more movement and exercise into our daily routines. Why is exercise really the ‘best’ medicine and why does my doctor keep recommending that I exercise more? Is there really a correlation between exercise and mental health? Absolutely!

In general, consistent exercise has proven to:

Exercise improves our physical health by helping our bodies fight off disease faster, preventing weight gain, promoting weight loss, lowering blood pressure and cholesterol, and prolonging our lives overall. Aside from improving our physical health, it has a huge impact on our mental health.

Some short-term effects of exercise on mental health are: stress relief, it provides a sense of accomplishment, reduces anxiety and panic attacks, among others. With consistent exercise, you can benefit from the long-term effects…alleviating anxiety, depression, improving self-esteem, increasing motivation, and building resilience to future stressors. Can you afford to add a minimum of 10-20 minutes every morning to start the day with a positive mindset?

What happens to your brain when you workout?

As you begin to workout, your brain recognizes it as a moment of stress. Your heart rate increases, you begin to sweat, and oxygen is pumped into your brain. Your body is in a state referred to as the ‘fight or flight’ response. The brain releases a flood of hormones during exercise. One of the most commonly known as endorphins. The reason we feel so alive and energetic after a good workout, also referred to as a “runner’s high,” is because of the endorphins released throughout the body. Endorphins minimize the perception of pain and trigger a positive feeling in the body. These endorphins not only minimize the ‘pain’ of the workout but also alleviate anxiety and depression, as well as reduce negative effects of stress. On the other hand, being low in endorphins can result in being more stressed out, anxious, and even depressed.

Studies show low levels of particular neurotransmitters in our brains can lead to mood disorders, such as depression and anxiety. Moderate exercise has proven to increase these levels, subsequently improving mood and reducing the risk of mood disorders.

Incorporating a few hours of moderate intensity exercise weekly can have major positive effects on your brain activity. It increases blood flow, improves structures in white matter that connects the brain to cognitive performance, increases the hippocampus which is responsible for memory and thinking skills, and reduces stress which in turn decreases cortisol levels.

We live in a fast-paced, driven time, where stress and demand are high, and leisure and self-care are low. Being in a constant state of stress is like being in the ‘fight or flight’ state without actually being in a threatening situation. When we are stressed, we are releasing extra cortisol. Increased levels of cortisol are dangerous to the body and can cause a number of issues: heart disease, diabetes, high blood pressure, weight gain, and memory loss, to name a few.

The Center of Disease Control and Prevention recommends 2.5 hour of moderate intensity aerobic exercise weekly. If walking isn’t your thing, there are many other types of exercise to choose from: swimming, stair climbing, kickboxing, tennis, and even dancing. Some household activities can be strenuous enough to cause your body’s response system to be activated as well.

The American Heart Association provides helpful tips for long-term success…

The benefits of exercise on our body and brain are abundant. The next time you are feeling stressed or down, consider sacrificing 10-20 minutes to work out and be mindful of how it positively impacts your mood when you are done!

Below are some resources for further information:

https://www.cdc.gov/physicalactivity/downloads/pa_fact_sheet_adults.pdf

http://www.heart.org/HEARTORG/HealthyLiving/PhysicalActivity/GettingActive/GettingStarted—Tips-for-Long-term-Exercise-Success_UCM_307979_Article.jsp#.WMW7XDuaF2M

Research and Treatment Program at Southern Methodist University in Dallas and co-author, with Otto, of the 2011 book “ Exercise for Mood and Anxiety: Proven Strategies for Overcoming Depression and Enhancing Well-being. ”

Mary Mika, Psy.D.

Athans and Associates

Behavioral Health Care Consultants

32 Main Street, Park Ridge, IL 60068

www.athansandassociates.net

(847) 823-4444

The Mind, Body and Soul Connection

Tue, 14 Feb 2017 16:00:00 GMT

When was the last time you enjoyed a quiet mind? Have you found yourself attached to an emotion or thought? Have you noticed that often thoughts and emotions produce physical symptoms? In order to improve the well-being of an individual, we need to view them from a mind-body-soul perspective.

We often have heard “just try taking a deep breath” when stressed. Why? We know that when we take a deep breath it signals to our brain to relax. Focusing on breathing has been found to have positive results on well-being. One way that psychologists teach this technique is through the use of biofeedback. Biofeedback is a form of treatment that teaches individuals to use signals from their body to improve their health. This leads to an awareness into how their minds and bodies work together in response to stress and anxiety. Learning about one’s heart and breathing rates when stressed is an example of how this awareness is achieved. Biofeedback can help many different conditions such as anxiety, chronic pain and attention deficit hyperactivity disorder.

Of equal importance is the awareness of our thought world. Our thoughts can have the capacity to lead to rumination and distortions. There is an interconnection between our thoughts, feelings and behaviors. Often certain thoughts will trigger emotional, physical and behavioral reactions. It makes sense that paying attention to our thoughts and learning how to examine and challenge them are key skills to develop.

For many people, spiritual and religious practices play a significant role in their mental and physical health. This often involves prayer and meditation and a sense of truth and deeper connection. This often includes a social component that promotes the practice of kindness, unconditional love and forgiveness. These practices have been found to alleviate stress which are one of the risk factors for disease.

Cultivating your mind-body-soul connection may seem like a great task! This is already a part of you but the key is to focus on it. Here are some resources to assist you:

Interactive video about mental and physical health from the American Psychological Association: http://www.apa.org/flash/helpcenter/anatomy/index.aspx

Meditation and Mindfulness App: www.headspace.com

Books: How God Changes Your Brain by Andrew Newberg, M.D. and Mark Robert Waldman

Dr. Violet Theodos

Licensed Clinical Psychologist

Athans and Associates

Behavioral Health Care Consultants

32 Main Street, Park Ridge, IL 60068

www.athansandassociates.net

(847) 823-4444

About the Author:

Dr. Vickie Theodos is a senior- level licensed clinical psychologist practicing at Athans and Associates for over ten years. She received her doctoral degree in clinical psychology from the Illinois Institute of Technology and completed her clinical child psychology internship from The University of Chicago Department of Psychiatry.

Dr. Theodos’ interests include family and marital issues, coping with medical illnesses, depression, anxiety, pain management, bereavement, effective parenting, behavioral issues, and working with pediatric patients. Dr. Theodos uses biofeedback to aid in stress-management as well as helping patients with pain. She is an experienced clinician, researcher, and presenter.

Burnout and Self-Care

Wed, 01 Feb 2017 16:00:00 GMT

Pre-Test

Before we begin, think about these questions in regards to self-care:

Where are we in the year?

For most students, the long Winter Break just ended, and we are transitioning back to a typical school schedule. Some parents were able to join their children with an extended break over the holidays, and are also transitioning back to a work schedule. Others have continued to work through the holidays and never actually received a significant holiday break.

It can be extremely difficult and exhausting meeting our academic and work needs without engaging in self-care. Without self-care, we may experience the phenomena known as “burnout.”

Burnout

Burnout describes what happens when a student or professional becomes increasingly “inoperative.” In other words, burnout commonly is described as emotional exhaustion, depersonalization, and reduced performance. It can take many forms; rigidity, irritability, feeling helpless, or quickness to anger. As burnout worsens, its affects can take a more serious turn; paranoia, self-medication, or being closed off to all feedback.

We may not pay full attention to the reality of burnout until suddenly everything seems overwhelming. We may lack the knowledge of what is transpiring to assess our experience objectively that would enable us to take proper measures to restore balance to our lives.

It is important to address this complicated exhaustion before the feeling of depletion leads to dysfunction and beyond.

What’s the answer?

Self-care!

Self-care can be defined as the balancing activities in which people can engage to preserve personal longevity and happiness in their relationships, and their careers. By engaging in self-care, we can assert our right to be well and reintroduce our own needs into the question. It’s common to feel guilty about needing to take care of ourselves, but it’s also the healthy and healing choice in order to take care of others when we need to.

Keep in mind, no single technique will relieve all of your stress. However, by paying attention to our physical and emotional self, we will increase our ability to effectively manage stress as well as our resilience, or our ability to “bounce back.”

Activities of self-care span a wide range and can include:

Overall

Our lives may never be stress free, but there is so much you can do to make sure you are appropriately engaging in self-care in order to improve your well-being, while helping alleviate work/school related stress that can lead to burnout.

Remember those self-care questions at the beginning of this article? After reading more about burnout and self-care, do you have some new ideas? I hope so!

Dr. Adam Share is on the staff of Athans and Associates. He supports his clients through discovering personal strengths to build confidence, and engages clients in the therapeutic process through play and support therapies. Interventions may include cognitive-behavioral therapies, non-directive play therapy, music, art, and mindfulness-based therapy approaches. Dr. Share utilizes a systems approach incorporating all aspects of the individual’s environment into the therapeutic process.

Adam Share, Psy.D.

Athans and Associates

Behavioral Health Care

32 Main Street, Park Ridge, IL

(847) 823-4444

Holiday Stress

Sun, 20 Nov 2016 16:00:00 GMT

Holiday times remind us of special significance and meaning. Thanksgiving is an American tradition. It’s about being thankful for all that we have. Christmas, Hanukkah, Ramadan, Kwanzaa, and holidays at this time of year also have special meanings. Of course, New Year’s is a celebration of the ending of the year, with all the excitement about ushering in a New Year and making resolutions.

Holidays also tend to remind us about the past, including good and bad memories. Sibling rivalry issues may resurface at this time. Old family conflicts may also be replayed, resulting in hurt feelings, misunderstandings, and ultimate disappointment as we attempt to achieve approval from the ones we love.

Happy Holidays!

Michael J. Athans, Ph.D.

Licensed Clinical Psychologist

Athans and Associates

32 Main Street, Park Ridge, IL 60068

www.Athansandassociates.net

(847) 823-4444

Tips on improving quality of sleep

Thu, 20 Oct 2016 16:00:00 GMT

Have you ever laid in bed awake because of racing thoughts, worries, or endless to-do lists? Has your Fitbit recorded dozens of restless or awake moments throughout the night? These may be signs of insomnia-a sleep disorder characterized by difficulty falling and/or staying asleep. The National Sleep Foundation provides the following recommendations for hours of sleep:

Inadequate sleep can lead to a number of emotional and health conditions (i.e. anger, depression, anxiety, forgetfulness, poor concentration, may lessen the ability to cope with stress and negatively affect relationships and work/academic performance). To increase the likelihood of quality sleep, it is important to have good sleep hygiene. For example, trying to go to bed at the same time and wake up at the same time every day. Additionally, avoid napping during the day, avoid caffeine, avoid nicotine, and avoid alcohol and large meals close to bed time. Make sure your bedroom is a relaxing space that is designated for sleep. Also, avoid using electronic devices (TV, phone, computer, tablets, etc.) before bed and certainly not IN bed.

In recent years, researchers have found measurable benefits of both yoga and meditation in relation to sleep quality. Mindfulness meditation is described as a practice of developing awareness of your sensations in the current moment in a non-judgmental and accepting way of your emotions, thoughts, and feelings. Practice this for one minute: sit comfortably with your feet on the floor, close your eyes, and focus on your breath as you inhale and exhale. You may even say “Relax” as you exhale each breath. Notice how that feels.

Many of my patients who have been using guided meditation on a regular basis have noticed a significant improvement in sleep quality. It is helpful to find the “right fit” with the suggestions contained in the guided meditation. Listen to a few different ones and find the one that you connect with the most. I recommend practicing guided meditation daily and for the purpose of improved sleep quality to incorporate it into your night time routine.

Below is a list of suggested meditation websites and YouTube videos:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RfDS_udKkrQ

http://www.mindfulness-solution.com/DownloadMeditations.html

https://health.ucsd.edu/specialties/mindfulness/programs/mbsr/Pages/audio.aspx

Below is a list of apps available on iPhone and Android:

Relax with Andrew Johnson (free version available)

Deep Sleep with Andrew Johnson

Meditation Oasis

Oprah and Deepak’s 21-Day Meditation Experience

Calm

Stop, Breathe, & Think

Smiling mind (designed for children and young people)

Have a restful night!

Written by:

Dr. Anna Adams, Psy.D.

Licensed Clinical Psychologist

Athans and Associates

32 Main Street,

Park Ridge, IL 60068

(847) 823-4444

Back-to-School

Sun, 28 Aug 2016 16:00:00 GMT

It is that time of year again! School supplies are on sale, mailings arrive with teacher assignments, summer reading is frantically being completed. Where did that math packet go? If your house is like many, parents are counting the days until the children finally go back to school while the children have forbidden the word “school” be mentioned in the house.

For children, this time can trigger some significant anxiety. This may take on many forms. Some children are able to articulate their fears while many are not and their behavior changes as a sign of their distress. Children often complain of stomach aches or headaches in reaction to stress.

Anxiety at the beginning of a new school year is a common occurrence. As a former teacher, I can tell you that even the teachers have some anxiety about the new school year. Anxiety in itself is not a problem. When the anxiety causes distress for children and their families, it then becomes problematic. The following suggestions may help ease your child’s fears so that he or she may begin the new year ready for success:

This is just a short list of suggestions for you. If you do an internet search of back-to-school anxiety, you will find a myriad of other ways in which to assist your children. If first day jitters persist or your child suddenly becomes more reluctant to attend school, consult your child’s physician or a therapist for assistance as this may signal a greater problem.

Enjoy the new school year!

Written by,

Dr. Susan O’Grady, Psy.D.

Licensed Professional Counselor

Licensed Educator

Athans & Associates

32 Main Street, Park Ridge, IL 60068

Dealing with Worry, Panic, Anxiety and Stress

Sun, 08 May 2016 16:00:00 GMT

If we experience an actual physical threat (such as a near car accident) our body reacts instantly with an alarm system. Our Sympathetic Nervous System causes us to breathe faster, our heart rate increases, we sweat, our blood pressure increases. This is a natural bodily reaction and does not harm us. We call this a “fight-flight reaction.” However, sometimes there is no actual physical threat but our belief that something dangerous is about to occur.

Worry is the process of thinking that something negative and catastrophic will happen to us and we will not be able to cope with it. This may trigger the same Fight Flight reaction. This response is sometimes so uncomfortable and can even feel like a heart attack. People may end up in the emergency room thinking they are dying, losing control or “going crazy.” Physicians and psychologists call this a panic attack.

Unresolved worry may repeatedly trigger this same bodily fight-flight reaction. The panic attack may feel so uncomfortable that your mind tells you it is dangerous. You want to escape the situation to relieve the uncomfortable dreaded feeling. You may begin to avoid life situations that you think causes the discomfort.

Speaking to a psychologist can help you understand and cope with worry and reduce negative thoughts. A psychologist can help you learn to learn to deal with life stressors. A psychologist can teach you methods to reduce your psychical reactivity to stress. Reading a book about anxiety may be helpful. The Worry Trick by Dave Carbonell is one example.

Dr. Lynda Behrendt

Licensed Clinical Psychologist

Athans & Associates

32 Main Street, Park Ridge, IL 60068

Parenting on Purpose: Incorporating mindfulness into everyday life

Mon, 21 Mar 2016 16:00:00 GMT

It’s a common scene at my house: I’m washing dishes, the baby starts to cry, the 2-year-old drops her milk, and the dog barks to go out. My thoughts can read something like this: “I just wanted to get this one thing done! Where is my husband? Are the kids and the dog conspiring against me?” Or, I can pause. Take a breath. Recognize my options for responding to the scene, and acknowledge that I can only do one thing at a time. “The dog has to go out. The baby needs to be picked up…so does the milk. Right now, I am washing this dish.”

Taking the emotional charge out of our reactions leaves us with the present moment for just what it is and can highlight the part of our present moment that we have control over. This technique is a part of something called mindfulness.

Mindfulness is the practice of grounding ourselves in the present, without getting too caught up in what might happen or what already happened. Practicing mindfulness in parenting can allow us to enjoy our days and feel more connected with our children.

For any parent, it is possible to have 481 things on your mind at any one time…approximately. These things can distract us from our children and deny us the happiness of the moment that we are in with them. If you find yourself in a situation like this, try one of the following mindfulness techniques:

Mindfulness is a unique practice for everyone. Some use meditation- sitting silently for a period of time, even if for just a couple of minutes- to focus on the here and now. Applying mindfulness in parenting is all about recognizing the choices we have in terms of how we react to and interact with our children. We can sit with our children, scrolling through our phones, planning for tomorrow, not really engaged, or we can focus our attention on the moment and enjoy it for what it is.

So the next time you are singing bedtime songs for your toddler, worried about whether or not she’s sick, and thinking about the blog you have to write for work, take a breath. Remind yourself of the facts: she will be fine, the work will get done. Rockabye.

For additional readings on mindfulness, see: “Mindful Motherhood” by Cassandra Vieten, Ph.D. “Buddha’s Brain” by Rick Hanson, Ph.D.

Written By:

Dr. Jillian M. Wickery, Ph.D.

Licensed Clinical Psychologist

Athans and Associates

Clinical Lecturer in Psychology, Northwestern University